All of the jokes I know are unfit for this board - so I'll give this one a try and hope I don't offend anyone!

The Three Pigs
Lo stile dell'italiano dei tre maiali

Once upon a time there were three little pigs; the straw pig, the stick pig and the brick pig.
One day, this nasty old wolf came up to the straw pigs house and said "I'm gonna huff and puff and blow your house down." And he did!!

So the straw pig went running over to the stick pigs house and said "Let me in, the wolf just blew my house down." So the stick pig let the straw pig in.

Just then, the wolf showed up at the stick pigs house and and said, "I'm gonna huff and puff and blow your house down." And he did!!

So the straw pig and the stick pig went running over to the brick pigs house and said "Let us in, Let us in, the big bad wolf just blew our houses down!"

So the brick pig let them in just as the wolf showed up. The wolf said "I'm gonna huff and puff and blow your house down." The straw pig and the stick were so scared! But the brick pig picked up the phone and made a call.

A few minutes passed and a big, black Caddy pulls up. Out steps two massive pigs in pin-striped suits and fedora hats. These pigs came over to the wolf, grabbed him by the neck and beat the living crap out of him, then one of them pulled out a gun, fired and blew him away, got back in their car and drove off.

The straw pig and the stick pig looked at each other in amazement. "Who the hell were those guys' they asked. The brick pig responded "those were my cousins, the Guinea Pigs!

Janel