An elderly man is sitting on a park bench, sobbing his heart out. A passerby, feels sorry for the old man, stops and hands the elderly gentleman a kleenex, and says,"You seem to be in a great deal of pain...can I help you in any way?"

The old man looks at the passerby and says, "I got married last week. I'm 86 years old. My wife is 29. She loves me to death. We have fantastic sex. She's a marvellous cook. She keeps the house clean as anything. She treats me like a king!"

The passerby says, "Holy cow! That sounds fantastic! So, why are you crying?"

The old man starts sobbing uncontrollably again and says, "I forgot where I live!"

"First you forget names, then you forget faces, then you forget to pull your zipper up, then you forget to pull your zipper down." ~ Leo Rosenberg
Brenda

Brenda, which came first -- the quote or the joke?

ROTFLMBO

Earline

I have to post this as a reply, since I haven't hit 100 posts yet. I perform as a volunteer at nursing homes and assisted living centers. One day while performing, a lady in the audience would smile broadly each time I looked her direction. I assumed that she knew me from some previous encounter, but I could not place her. At the conclusion of the performance, I walked to her and asked, "Ma'am, do you know who I am?" Her reply was, "No I don't, Honey. But if you'll ask at the front desk, they'll tell you."

Oh, yes. By the way, etc. When the reporter asked the gentleman on the occassion of his birthday, "What's the best thing about being 100?" the reply was "No peer pressure."

...and a true story...
On the day of his grandfather's 100th birthday, a son said, "Happy Birthday, Grandfather...that's one of those things if you heard it once, you've heard it a hundred times!"

Good ones, Larry...that woman is a darling! I must remember that line, you never know when it might come in handy!

An aside...my mom is in an extended care lodge, and truly it is one of the most difficult things to deal with for me as her daughter. Still, I know that for her it is difficult day in and day out, whereas for me it is difficult only in moments, here and there. I know how much she misses her "real life" and her own home, her bed, her own "stuff."
Thank you so much for taking time to give care and attention to people in the assisted living centers and nursing homes that you visit...I hope with all my heart that there are many kind people like you at my mom's lodge. I know a few of them and they make my mom's days so much more bearable just by being there.

Earline, that quote is one of my favorites! The joke was in an old Reader's Digest, from an interview with Alan Thicke, a good ol' Canadian boy!

"Never lose sight of the fact that old age needs so little but needs that little so much." ~ Margaret Willour
Brenda